What Smothers Your True Self? 7 Stumbling Blocks
Are you like a fake diamond you get out of a bubble gum machine or are you like the Hope Diamond in the Smithsonian Museum?
Contemplate the 7 stumbling blocks below by reflecting back on a time these have happened to you and what you would do differently right now!
Fear: We are scared of being hurt, ridiculed and not accepted, so we conform and smother our true self. It is easier to be what people WANT us to be.
Doubt: When dreaming about success in one form or another you talk yourself out of it, you don’t attempt to make it a reality. You doubt your ability to succeed.
Conformity Is Easier: It is hard to be different and stick out in a crowd because of the judgment and rejection of others. We want to belong so we don’t rock the boat.
Manipulation: Other people try to put you down and say negative things to keep you small and in your place.
Misery Loves Company: No one wants to be unhappy alone. That is because their true self is also suppressed.
Pride: Acceptance by those we care about the most so we take pride in being what they want us to be, it feels good but it isn’t necessarily who we really are.
Shame and Guilt: Making mistakes is part of life. When those mistakes are thrown in your face in an effort to keep you in specific mold, shame and guilt are waiting to beat you up.
What did you learn about yourself today?
We heal these stumbling blocks by creating healthy boundaries, processing the past, and living presently by making different choices.
We are only able to grow when we step out of our inner programming and into discomfort, and consciously shifting away from the patterns we know by making different choices.
Situations will repeat themselves until we learn the lessons, although change is scary, it can be quite rewarding in the end. It is better the feel the discomfort into the unknown than the despair we feel when repeating the same pattern over and over and staying in the illusion of feeling “at least I know.”
Our triggers can help us discover unmet needs and meet them by re-parenting those parts of ourselves that have been hurt.
We oftentimes feel triggered by certain people, qualities or situations they represent and either consciously or unconsciously we feel uncared for, attacked, neglected and rejected.
Next time this happens, ask yourself why you’re feeling such an intense emotion.
Learning from this experience helps us understand our triggers more deeply and it only THEN where we are able to shift the emotional response to being curious and kinder to ourselves.
Remember it is NOT about the other person…. Stay focused only on healing and learning about YOU!
“You have no friends. You have no enemies. You only have teachers.”
– Ancient Proverb