Everyone has a heart that needs to be tended to. Have you built walls around yours?

I wanted to share with you just a few precious presents that I have received from friends and loved ones that have involve hearts.

Many know how much I love and collect hearts, I guess because I relate them to people. 

Some are smooth, some have texture, others are big, some are small. I  love all the different variations of this beautiful shape.

We ALL have a heart and honoring everyone’s differences and experiences allows us to see the beauty we all have inside.

I am filled with gratitude and love and will always hold these treasures and the meaning behind them forever in my heart. 

As Valentine’s Day approaches; it is a difficult holiday for many people. During this time reaching out to others is something we all can do and you never know how much a small gesture can make a huge difference to someone feeling unloved. 

Our world is based on ego-driven success as we compare ourselves to others, judge our performance, define our worth based on financial and career achievements and criticize ourselves for failure.

We keep wanting more, but never seem satisfied because we believe happiness is something that can be obtained externally; BIG MISTAKE!!

It is great to achieve success and take pride in our accomplishments and hard work, but true happiness is an “inside job” it comes when we feel fulfilled, we feel loved and that we belong!

We ALL suffer and have moments of struggle; this simple acknowledgment can open our hearts and connect us all!

Most of us have been taught to think and not feel. That it is safer to put up walls around our hearts and look for ways to be perfect and search for the approval from others that we are worthy enough, this doesn’t work!! 

This leaves us feeling alone, unhappy and empty.

If we want to live our lives and not just EXIST in them we need to look inside and find love there FIRST. We need to reconnect with our bodies and your hearts because that is where inner peace and joy really exist!

Getting back in touch with our bodies is the first step to healing our soul, opening our hearts, and dropping our ego.

This practice is unique for everyone; some practice yoga, others like to meditate. Ask yourself this questionWhat am I able to do for 30 minutes for myself that would give me the time to get out of my head and into my heart?”

One practice for me is being in nature.

It heals my soul no matter where I am, but walking on the beach is my favorite!  All my senses come alive as I focus on being in the moment; the salty smell of the ocean, listening to the calming sound and rhythm as the waves coming to shore, noticing all the contrasting colors from the puffy white clouds to sapphire blue sky grounds and centers allowing me to focus on my body-heart connection.

As people are walking, swimming and looking for shells I am filled with joy and feel we are enjoying this experience together; we all belong here; my heart swells with gratitude and I often wonder what their hearts might be feeling too. 

If you have been running from your pain for a long time the pain comes from your story, and your ego is entangled in it.

The way to untangle and release the pain is to become the author of your life and rewrite your story.

Journaling can uncover our inner pain and suffering, bringing into awareness our fears of not being good enough, unlovable and alone.

Writing is like having a deep conversation with ourselves. When we tend to the wounds we have been avoiding, we develop empathy and compassion for ourselves… we have the freedom to choose to not buy into those thoughts and choose differently.

We learn to respond wisely to what is in front of us instead of reacting from our unconscious programming and out of learned fear. It is an activity that allows us to drop the mask, explore our hang-ups and distorted beliefs without judgment. This deepens our inner knowing and helps us change our perspective about ourselves and the world.

When we release our stored up pain, our whole life and our HEARTS begin to soften, we drop the armor and our story changes.

Here are some writing prompts that could help you get started on releasing up those blocks and opening your heart:

  1. How did your family of origin show (or withhold) love?
  2. What are you most ashamed about regarding your family?
  3. What did you not get as a child that you are now seeking as an adult?
  4. How was anger expressed or repressed in your family growing up?

When we look at our past, we can shed light on the unconscious patterns and beliefs we accepted as truths. 

Making time to reconnect with your body, befriend your mind, become the author of your story will stop you from being a slave to your ego, and start living a freer, happier and more authentic life.

You may need help with this. If it’s too painful to begin on your own, contact me, perhaps I can help.

Maria Bucci, M.Ed LPC DWC-F. Daring Way Facilitator by Dr. Brené Brown
Maria Bucci, M.Ed LPC DWC-F. Daring Way Facilitator by Dr. Brené Brown

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